Ladies, do you ever find yourself tossing and turning in bed
at night, unable to sleep due to the crippling anxiety you have towards the
notion of not being perceived as a ‘real woman’ by misogynists? No, me neither.
Gentlemen, does the thought of a girl not mutilating their bodies with razor
blades in an attempt to remove the same hair you have in the same places make
you want to gag? No? Still, have no fear because the people of Twitter (yes…
again) have simplified womanhood into a few concise rules that every member of
the female species must follow. NOTE:
These are all quoted directly from the account.
Rule Number One: “Don’t
dress like a slut if you don’t wanna be perceived as a slut #keepitclassy”
Don’t you dare dress how you want to dress, and don’t even
think of crafting your appearance for anyone but the men you are undoubtedly attempting
to seduce! With the definition of slut being someone who has sex with multiple
different people, might it be possible that a woman could be desirable and
sensual? Be careful, you wouldn’t want people to think you get laid often! Or,
instead of abiding to this ridiculous and offensive ‘rule’, you could wear
whatever the hell you want and dress in a way that makes you love yourself? If you want to cover every inch of skin you have,
go for it, that’s fine. However, remember that if you want to wear something
slightly more revealing then that is equally fine. Dress to impress whomever
you want, but dress to make yourself feel comfortable and confident –
prioritise yourself.
Rule Number Two: “Don’t
ever say ‘Hi’ to a guy first.”
Always remind yourself that it’s vital that you continue the
segregation of the sexes in our society. Don’t speak unless spoken to, seen and
not heard… etc. Whilst doing so, you must blame yourself for the ‘friendzone’/being
seen as rude/being seen as cocky, conceited or stuck up, despite the fact that
you are being instructed to ignore your male friends and colleagues. Remember,
you’re a stern, cold-hearted bitch, and it’s your own fault, not that of the
people restricting you from interacting with others! On the other hand, you
could always decide to ‘rebel’ and speak to who you like, when you like, if you
like. After all, you don’t owe anyone your time or your thought, but if you
want to give it to them then you have every right to.
Rule Number Three: “Shave.”
If you do not take this sharp object – which is often used
as a murder weapon – to your skin and remove the hair that naturally grows, and
re-grows, and re-grows, then you cannot be a ‘real woman’. If you do not deny
yourself the right to possess the same bodily feature as your male
counterparts, then you cannot be a ‘real woman’. If you think for a second that
ditching the razor and embracing the hair is A-Okay then you cannot be a ‘real
woman’. However, if you’re not a fan of razor rash, and you’d rather not walk
out of the door with plasters covering your scabby knees, there is always
another option… just don’t shave? Don’t get me wrong, if, like me, you prefer
to get rid of hair for personal reasons, then that’s groovy, but if you can’t
be bothered to endure the effort then why listen to those who tell you to do
so? If someone cannot accept your body in its natural, untarnished state, and
if they cannot accept you in a way that makes you feel happy and
self-confident, then what’s the point? Besides, if your forearms are as hairy
as a man’s then that’s a bloody good competition. Stay warm in the winter if
you want to. Shave if you want to. Do whatever you want to, and whatever you
think is best for you.
Having looked through each and every tweet posted from this
account – all the while trying my hardest to refrain from tearing my hair out
of my head and snapping my phone in half – I have decided that it is all
bullshit, and should be whole-heartedly ignored/opposed. The thought that
people in the world still think this way is extremely worrying, and thoughts
like this can be unbelievably damaging. When will people realise that people
can do whatever they want so long as no one is being harmed in the process? Not
only are these ‘rules’ inappropriate, discriminate and degrading to all genders,
many of them are simply rude. It seems to me that many forget how to go about
being a decent human being. To anyone reading this: be nice.
